Maternity leave – expectations vs reality

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Now that i’m coming to the end of my first maternity leave, it’s safe to say that some of the expectations I had for my “year off” were VERY unrealistic and dreamy!

 

Expectation: Lots of time to watch box sets

Reality: I think I have managed one box set in the early days after giving birth, whilst breastfeeding *constantly*, but that was it!!! These days it’s Lorraine and This Morning on in the background if i’m lucky, whilst shouting “no, don’t touch that” every second minute!

 

Expectation: I’ll be able to sleep when baby sleeps

Reality: Sleep? What’s sleep?! I was told this A LOT when the little man was born, and it is the biggest load of sh*t!! Firstly, you can’t just turn on sleep, because what’s likely to happen is that they wake up as soon as you fall asleep and then you feel a hundred times worse (sound familiar?). And secondly, unless you have a cook, cleaner, maid that lives with you, then you need to use that time to get stuff done around your house, or just have a shower!

 

ExpectationLots of sitting in coffee shops having chats with mummy friends

Reality: Now this is something that I was really looking forward to, but in reality it has been trying to wolf down a coffee & some cake before the little one throws the mother of all tantrums and needs feeding / entertaining. NOT relaxing at all!

 

ExpectationWandering around the shops whilst browsing at my leisure

Reality: Get in and out as quickly as I can (before another tantrum prevails). The end.

 

Expectation: Having dinner ready for when my husband gets home from work

Reality: I thought this was something that I would have loads of time for. In reality it was clock watching the whole afternoon whilst trying not to rip my hair out / cry (most days!), and then handing the bundle of joy over as soon as he gets home, and shutting myself in the bedroom for some silence. This leaves time for a frozen pizza to be shoved in the oven, or time to ring for a take-away. No 1950’s housewife here!!

 

Expectation: Having a tidy house

Reality: I’ll be at home all day so can get loads done, yes? NO. Babies make a LOT of mess, and i’m just not quick enough (or bothered enough anymore) to tidy up after him. I now do a quick tidy after he has gone to bed every night so he can’t mess it up again within seconds.

 

Expectation: Lots of spare time

Reality: I’ll admit, I was naive. I hardly get time to have a wee in peace, let alone anything else (including all of the above)!

 

Right, enough is enough – get me back to work so I can wee in peace and have hot cups of tea!

Mummy S x

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