A letter to the other candidate……

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Dear K,

We have worked together now for almost 6 years in total, both moving from one organisation to another. Although we haven’t always had the best relationship, we have managed to remain civil, and have a natter every now and then.

When I left for maternity leave, it was all very exciting as it was my first baby, you had already had 2, and I was also moving house at the same time. Your advice and tips on managing that were gratefully received.

However, when on maternity leave, my boss contacted me to tell me about a new opportunity that was coming up, and encouraged me to apply for it. I knew that you would probably be going for that job too, as it was a promotion within your team, but I didn’t see that as a problem.

I think you were a bit shocked to see me on the day of the interview, as you didn’t realise I had applied. I saw the surprise on your face, and therefore post interview text you just to say good luck. I thought that was the grown up thing to do.

When I received the phone call I was in total, utter shock, as I never thought that they would give me the job. Especially seeing as I still had 6 months of maternity leave left, and had just been off with baby number 1. When I spoke to my boss, he told me that you hadn’t been very happy with the news, and that you may take a while to adjust.

I didn’t think any more of it until I came in for my keeping in touch days and you didn’t even acknowledge me. How was I supposed to manage someone who didn’t even make eye contact with me? I voiced my concerns with management, and a few weeks later when I heard you were leaving, I was quite relieved.

You are still friendly with lots of people at work, and that is fine. I am used to the fact that you may pop in to see everyone and ignore me. But ask yourself this – who gave me the job? Why is it that you are super friendly with the people who gave me the job, and it’s me you have chosen to punish?

As a fellow mum, you should know how hard it is coming back to work after a baby, especially to a new role. I was hoping that you would be one of those people I could count on for support when I returned to work – I was obviously wrong. I thought that women lifted each other up in the workplace – obviously not here.

However, I do want to thank you for something.

You have made me realise that I don’t care (or I try my hardest not to). I come to work to work. I work to build my career and earn a wage for my family. However, as soon as I have finished – it’s about shutting off, and going home to spend time with my family. So thank you, for making me realise what’s important, and teaching me how never to behave.

Mummy S x

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